I've been majorly MIA. And while I miss writing so so much, I've been doing my fair share of actual penning in my leather-bound journal. There is just so much going on inside of me and so much transpiring and unfolding in my life. I really do like to write about things here and explore them out loud, but at this moment my life is about other people (my husband, my kids) as much as it is about myself, and when those are happier healthier things I'm happy to share them here. But for now, since they are sad and shaky and not-so-simple, I'd rather not exploit myself and my family much... When things are more settled and certain I will be back to writing honestly and sharing my feelings about my struggles and pain and growth...
That said, I've been missing from this scene due to business and busy-ness more than anything else. I've had the shock of suddenly realizing that I may need to be supporting myself completely. And so I've had to create a plan on the spot. Actually, scratch that. There wasn't even time for a plan. I just had to do it. So! I completely threw myself into growing Babyccino, since that's what I had to begin with. (And even that didn't exactly go smoothly, there's been unexpected opposition and threats that make me feel like I'm a living soap opera. But more on what I've leant from opposition another time! :)) The fright of having to go from full-time mom to full-time businessperson has been draining and exhilarating at the same time. And I really haven't had much mental space for anything but that and just getting through my regular day-to-day life. It's amazing how my whole world can fall apart, and yet it's all still going - I've got carpools, and dinners, and nightmares, and playdates, and nursing, and morning meltdowns, playgrounds...the list goes on. Pretty endlessly. And I'm happy and grateful for all of it; it keeps me from falling apart, it keeps me on my feet. And mostly, those little things - those little girls keep me smiling.
Anyways! The reason for this post was to share with you my current inspiration: Tina Roth Eisenberg, otherwise known as SwissMiss, has been compelling me for years. This video had sparked something inside of me months ago:
And this week I've been moved and motivated by this Free Radicals article for PSFK, titled "Why Confronting Deep Fear is the Key to Creativity" - which piqued my interest immediately. Here's a few of my favorite key points, but you should definitely head over there and read the full article:
I just start thinking about where am I in my life, it’s like this milestone where you have to stop bullshitting yourself, you have to really address the things you want to do.
If I’m aiming to do one thing, it’s to have one set of values that I can apply both at work and at home, because at the end of the day, work and home—you’re just being you.
I have this personal rule, if I’m afraid of something, I really need to do it, because that means that I will learn a lot from it. That’s what I live for. I live for that feeling that I’ve dared, I’ve tried something new, and I’ve learned something new.
The Creative Mornings concept she created is what really got my gut to tell me to grow Babyccino, to try something new, something adventurous. It made me think that if something is wonderful and necessary in your world, it's very likely wonderful and necessary in other worlds as well. Creative Mornings inspired me to realize that when something works in one place, it can very well work as well in another. And that thought is what helped incubate the Babyccino curriculum idea. I've been so busy with it, and it's been such a learning curve for me. And, mostly, I'm so happy that it's been successful - Babyccino is now operating in over 15 cities nationwide, and in more than 20 schools and organizations!!
And that my friends, is where I have been. It's been long and tiring and tedious, but mostly it's been fun and enjoyable. For real! I will be making an effort to get back into the mode of writing here, especially because I have a few very awesome - albeit very materialistic - finds to share with you! Stay tuned...